I awoke to my phone ringing, groggy eyes shut, I rolled over to take a look. It was lacey, my girlfriend. I answered the phone to say hi – I figured that it was time for me to get up and start my day regardless. With this in mind I sat up on the edge of my bed. Lacey sounded somber and cold, something was wrong. A few seconds into the conversation I understood that something was up……after a long pause on the phone she stated “have you talked with Steve?” I replied, no, and was curious as to why she asked. Another long pause, and she revealed the news to me. “Something happened to Bobby last night and he passed away”

Shock. Utter shock. I went silent to try and grapple with the gravity of her statement.

A few seconds later she repeated the news to me.

“Hello?” “are you there?”

I said yes and still remained silent. My mind was racing faster than it ever has in my entire life. Is this true? What happened? How serious is this? Is this a joke? Where is he? What happened? Is this true? Who told you? Is this true? Is this true? Is this true?

Completely blindsided by one of the heaviest statements of my life, I needed to understand the situation as it really was. I gave Steve a call and he confirmed my worst fears. Bobby had passed away.

My eyes swelled up and my mind was still racing. It has been racing all day. My heart hurts knowing that I cannot be in Chico with my friends. Talking on the phone is not an efficient way of grieving. You need to hug and sit. Not even talk, presence is enough. It kills me knowing that I can not be in Chico at this moment. I can not fathom how hard this situation is for everyone up there.

I am not sure why I am writing this, most of my life, in times of crisis or mourning I have always wrote about them. Something about thinking through thoughts and translating them onto paper helps me wrap my head around certain situations. This I assume is no different.

I live in Los Angeles now, I have a roommate and a few friends. This city is hard to navigate, it is much different from where I had spent the last 5 years of my life, in Chico. Finding honest, genuine people is a challenge in LA. Maybe it is not just LA, maybe this is a challenge when one moves to any new city, but regardless, it is hard here.

It is moments like Bobbys passing when ones true character is tested – not lightly, but fully tested and taken to the extreme. In my opinion it is important to judge ones character on how they react and respond to hard and challenging times, this, to me is one of those times. One of those times when the brutal reality of life and death is thrust upon you and you have no choice but to react to it. None of us have a choice as to whether or not we are going to be put in this situation. We are in this situation, and we are reacting, grieving, and living the best we know how. There is no “manual” on how to deal with something as heavy as death. There are no “rules” no “perfect path” – there is only family, friends and yourself. In my opinion these tools are extremely powerful.

Now I can not control one’s family ties, for the most part, that is predetermined. But I do know this:

Our group of friends, both new and old, are strong.

I am extremely fortunate to have formed such genuine and long lasting friendships in Chico. We are a very tight-knit circle, which to me, is extremely important. I am thankful everyday that I have such genuine and solid friendships in other places than LA.

I am not saying that there will not be more friendships formed and bonds made as I grow. I am simply saying that I understand who I already care about and it is times like this that remind you who those people are.

The point of all this? Hold those who you care deeply about close to you. You need them, in times of strain, in times of joy – they are crucial to your existence. Bobby, and all of my friends from Chico, are incredible. I am blessed to have formed such strong relationships, it is something that many may never find.

Bobby was a beautiful human being. Intelligent, funny, charismatic, charming - truly incredible. He never ceased to put a smile on someones face or go with the flow. He was mellow and laid back, yet active and outgoing. He will be missed by nearly everyone he interacted with and I am confident he is in a better place.

Most of all I want to say thank you to all of my friends, for supporting eachother. Too often we overlook the small things. Bobby was a beautiful intelligent person and he will live on through the hundreds of memories he has blessed each of us with. I am confident we will prevail, it will be hard, but we will keep moving. Things will get better and we will never forget Bobby Sheehan. May you rest in peace, save a seat in heaven for me.

So check this out, this kid is a freak.

Best Football Catch This Year - Watch more free videos

So I have been sick the last few days, and not that thats not bad enough but I have had ex girlfriend drama thrust upon me as well. So needless to say it is Wednesday and I need to have some mother fucking FUN! I need to rage it like it is Labor Day Weekend in Tahoe. If you are in or around the Sexramento area, holler at me and lets rage. I need to blow off some serious steam. Another Vodka Red Bull experiment possibly??

i have learned this first hand over the past 10 days on tour. The most scandolous slutty girls are the ones have boyfriends. Its hilarious. Life on the road so far has surpassed all my expectations and thoughts that i had about what life really is like on the road.

oh and i have learned to master the wet wipe shower. More to come folks!

Barker’s assistant, security guard and two others were killed.

this crash was gnarly, our thoughts are with both of them. see below.

Former Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker and DJ AM were critically injured in a plane crash Friday night in Columbia, South Carolina. The plane’s four other passengers were killed.

Lexington County Deputy Coroner Brian Setree confirmed for MTV News on Saturday morning (September 20) that three men and a woman died in the crash. The victims were: Barker’s assistant, Chris “Little Chris” Baker, 29, of Studio City, California; Barker’s security guard, Charles Still, 25, of Los Angeles; the plane’s pilot, Sarah Lemmon, 31, of Anaheim, California; and her co-pilot, James Bland, 52, of Carlsbad, California. While TMZ originally reported that Baker, who appeared on MTV’s reality show “Meet the Barkers,” was newly married and that his wife recently gave birth, it reported late Saturday that she was about to give birth, and the fatal flight was booked was so Baker could be with her as soon as possible. TMZ reported that Baker’s wife went into labor Saturday morning.

Barker and AM had just performed at a free T-Mobile-sponsored show in the Five Points area, along with Perry Farrell and headliner Gavin DeGraw. Though early reports had suggested that DeGraw may have been on the plane at the time of the crash, DeGraw’s father, Wayne, told MTV News that he’d spoken to his son Saturday morning and that he was fine. Farrell’s manager, Peter Katsis, confirmed that Farrell was not on the plane.

Beth Frits, a spokesperson for the Joseph M. Still Burn Center in Augusta, Georgia, confirmed that AM (born Adam Goldstein) and Barker were transported to a hospital in Columbia following the crash. They were transferred — AM by helicopter and Barker by ambulance — to the Still Center soon after. She told CNN that both men had “extensive burns.”

According to TMZ.com, Barker sustained burns from the waist down, while AM suffered facial burns; UsMagazine.com reported that AM was in a doctor-induced coma and will undergo skin grafts. Both sites cited unnamed sources; MTV News was unable to confirm those reports at press time.

On Saturday afternoon, members of both men’s families were reportedly traveling to Georgia to be with them.

The crash took place just before midnight on Friday and involved a twin-engine private Learjet with six passengers onboard, according to Lynne Douglas, public information officer for the Columbia Metro Airport. While taking off, the plane, which never left the ground, overran the runway, struck an antenna array and several lights, and began sending up sparks. It skidded off the end of the runway, through a perimeter fence separating the airfield from a nearby roadway, and then crossed the roadway, coming to a stop on an embankment. The plane caught fire on impact. Douglas said two passengers — who were later confirmed to be AM and Barker — escaped the aircraft while it was on the ground, while the other two passengers and crew members died in the crash.

The National Transportation Safety Board confirmed these details during a press conference, which was held shortly after 11:30 a.m. Saturday. A 10-member team from the NTSB, along with investigators from the Federal Bureau of Investigation, is on the scene, trying to determine what caused the crash. Federal Aviation Administration spokeswoman Kathleen Bergen described the post-crash fire as “significant.”

An eyewitness told NBC news affiliate WIS that he saw a fireball crossing the road near the airport and then realized it was a plane. He saw jet fuel shoot out across the roadway and then saw two men, who were both on fire, patting each other down to extinguish the flames.

Barker, 32, and DJ AM, 35, were the house band for the 2008 VMAs.

Its been a really busy day here in Santa Cruz as we prepare to leave to start tour tomorrow. Today i picked up the trailer with Adam, counted in a shitload of new merchandise and loaded up the gear tonight with Donovan, and then saw New Found Glory @ The Catalyst with Shaun. Tour starts tomorrow. Things are going to get weird.

So it seems to me that ever since John McCain named his VP and she has been on her whirlwind tour, he has been very much in the backdrop of the whole show. Since this has happened the country has started to lean towards their “team” more than before. So my question is, are they voting for President, or really for the VP? I hope it’s not really all for the VP because if they elect her they will have a shock when she is only the VP and he is really running the show and we are back to the same President we have had for the last 8 years.

So last night was what seemed like Jahan’s 6th or 7th last night of going out before he left for touring. Good times had by all once again though. Props to the bartender girl at Hacienda for the 3 Vodka Red Bulls for 7.50 deal all night.

So I want to start a pool based on which city Jahan, the Kosher Kannon will contract a Venereal Disease while on tour. A list of tour dates is available on www.theexpendables.net so if you see a city on there that strikes your fancy for Jahan getting the clap or the ninja or just your run of the mill case of crabs, let me know!

Google is at it again, with major plans to further solidify their over arching king-of-the-entire-fucking-internet presence with their latest installation the “google chrome” web browser. “Google Chrome is a browser that combines a minimal design with sophisticated technology to make the web faster, safer, and easier.” aka. watch out Firefox, IE, and Safari because google is coming with heat guided missiles for your dome. It is currently in Beta and is only available for windows xp / vista. Once the beta is done you can expect the full launch, for now, i’m rocking it (on a work computer). Read more here..


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